johnsu01 (johnsu01) wrote,

Getting Crazy with the Canned Air

"Teens once inhaled nitrous oxide from cans of whipped cream, but now many are inhaling compressed air from cans of computer dusting products and the results can be deadly."

I always wondered, who the first kids brave enough to try stupid things like this are. I mean, to just put a can up to your mouth and pull the trigger is pretty risky, if you ask me. This kind of courage is powerful stuff, and somehow we need to recognize it and channel it elsewhere. I guess for now, the solution is to require ID to buy air. Hm.

This brought back a few fond barista memories. Because we made the whipped cream by hand, there were always boxes and boxes and boxes of chargers around. The cafe was very busy, so it was not uncommon for me to be pouring damn fine drinks or steaming velvety milk or pulling buttery shots with one hand while shaking the whipped cream cannister and then whipping drinks with the other, especially during the winter when all the kneebiters sledded in screaming for hot chocolate --- and then for admission to the burn unit after tasting it.

So one time things got a little slippery with all the fluids flowing around, and I clocked myself right on the chin with the bottom of the thing at the top of a vigorous shake, right in front of the morning zombie rush. There was some blood, there was some coffee, there was some blood in some coffee. I had to tag out to the busser and apply some direct pressure in the men's room.

At least the sympathy tips were good.

Then there was the exploding cannister. Bad gasket. After applying the second charge, BOOM. Nascent whipped cream all over me and all over the kitchen; dripping from the coffee, the glasses, the syrups, the urns, the timecards, the walk-in, the sinks, the teas, and me. Not to mention the sudden transformation of the floor into a wet banana with a lawsuit instead of a kiddie pool at the end. Again, during the rush. And I'm a vegan.

I wish those days could come back once more
Why did those days ev-er have to go
I wish those days could come back once more
Why did those days ev-er have to go
Cause I love them so

-- Stevie Wonder

Tags: barista, drugs, kids
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